3 Stupid Things

I know three stupid things I DON'T want to do!

The first one ties back into the "do opposites attract?" idea. I received a new phone for Christmas, and this week I taught myself a feature, always a proud moment for me, a person who was afraid to try "attachments" for close to a year. I realized that I could give each family member their own ringtone, I often wondered how people do that...anyhoo, I was sharing my excitement with Portia and my husband, I had Portia call me and we oohed over the piano glissando, I had John call me, and we heard this funny barking dog. But somehow, he wasn't laughing. He was insulted, like "You made me the Barking Dog? That is SO condescending". I would have to live a hundred lifetimes before you could make me care what ringtone you gave me. His reaction was so unexpected, but I have agreed to change it....
Portia had a friend visiting for the weekend, her plane was arriving yesterday at 3:30, so the plan was for me to pick Portia up at our house at 3PM and then we would go together to the airport. I guess I've had a lucky stretch, as I have two 19 year olds and a 16 year old and no one has ever gotten into an accident...until 2:45 yesterday, when Portia called me hysterical, no one was injured, but both cars were banged up pretty good, so all plans got entangled, calming her down, police report, etc. I went to the airport alone and scooped up the girl, and today I get to wait for AAA to come tow the car to the Collision Center, not exactly the way I'd envisioned my holiday to start.
Finally, we have a snowball stand about 150 yards away from our house, (up north you call them snowcones). It is only open April thru August, but it is VERY popular, where else can you get a delicious treat for $1.39 these days???
I live on a corner, and my neighbors across the street have a beautiful home with an incredible garden that they work on every weekend (in Ralph Lauren Casualwear). He has a bounty of flowering blooms, and he knows the Latin name for all of them, planted with the ideal sunlight, framing a semi-circle of the most perfect verdantly green grass your imagination could come up with, and he once had basically this huge protracter out there, because the grass looked a little off-kilter, but he made it exactly exact. In the back yard, things are planted alphabetically and next to other herbs they would get along with... They are an elegant couple with high standards, I think he was a Navy Seal, very attractive, efficient couple with no kids, I imagine their refrigerator with a list of chores and a highlighter, and possibly occassional saluting...
As you can guess, they are not big fans of the snowball stand. In fact, they loathe its existance. Recently, he started putting orange cones all around his property on the weekends, so no one can park there, and he sort of patrols the perimeter all weekend long. The most recent addition is that he bought his own "No Parking" sign and mounted it in cement and has been rolling it out, which is great for him, but it's sort of a domino effect, if no one can park on his corner, my corner gets double the fun. I'm pretty sure you can't just put up your own signs, but then again, it is New Orleans, and 90% of the people are parked illegally, including the police cars, everyone likes a quick snowball now and then! Before I die, I'm going to park in front of my neighbor's house!

Patty